The perks of being married

No, I'm not referring to the mythical "sex on demand" perk. I'm talking about having someone who will gently remove your wide-awake infant from the bed at 5-something in the morning, just so both of you don't have to stay awake. Having someone who will bring you a spare set of keys when you lock yours in the car and have to be somewhere in 20 minutes. And a bunch of other things that were completely obvious to me earlier today when I thought about writing this post, but I've long since forgotten. The feeling of gratitude for someone to just *be* in this life with me is never far from the surface. I even felt this way before I got married -- I remember a (married) boss complaining once about some stupid aspect of being married. I lit into him about how at least he has someone to make him chicken soup when he's sick, and give him a ride when his car's in the shop. I was very single at the time and surely had a cold and a broken-down vehicle.

Another perk of being married is not having to raise your kids alone. This comes to mind because Steve has been busting his butt preparing for and running our second store at the festivals for several weeks. Yesterday and today were particularly horrendous schedule-wise: 8am to midnight. The kids miss him. I miss him. I had several "Calgon take me away!" moments today, mostly two kids hollor-crying at once. But they both went to bed on time and soon I'll have my wonderful house husband back and I'm just so very glad this is not my everyday life.

Intent vs. Action

Unitarians are academically oriented, therefore many churches take the Summer off. Our church, or Fellowship as it is called, reduces to one service instead of two, and the minister takes six weeks off. During this time, the service is "lay led." Today's speaker was Jim Westall, CEO of Skookum.

Jim's topic was "When our Highest Values Collide." He talked about some of Skookum's values, and how they collide daily (be the very best vs. hire severely disabled people). He talked a lot about how we all want to be judged by our intent, but we are always judged by our actions. And we judge other people by their actions too. This hit home to me on so many levels.

In my work and my relationships, I am sometimes too blunt, aggressive, curt. My intent is almost always that I want to be clear, and be clearly understood. But the action can mask the intent, so that all that is noticed is the delivery, not the message. There are so many other ways to interpret this intent vs. action idea. It is a good thing to remember when faced with what seems like a tough choice. Steve always tells me, "Just do the right thing." That's a little easier when you take time to make sure that your intent is aligned with your actions.

Another thing I've been thinking about today, not sure how this fits with the above, but here it is: I've run into my therapist several times in the last couple of days. I was aquainted with her before I started seeing her professionally, which I haven't done for about seven months. Anyway, as I'm talking to her, I am instantly transported back to that place - her office - where secrets were shared and tears were shed. This person knows things about me. How can you have a normal conversation out in the world with someone once you've shared that experience? I suppose some people might feel the same way about their medical doctor ("But she's seen me down there!") but I don't have any such issues with mine.

We match the same, Daddy!

HFCS

My latest nutritional obsession is High Fructose Corn Syrup. I just tossed everything in my fridge that had it listed as an ingredient (pickles, ketchup, bread, jam) and a few other useless items from the pantry (mostly cocoa mix). I'll be reading labels very carefully from now on.

A Happy Wilmo Weekend

The house is ever more trashed, but it was a fun-filled weekend. Friday night was "Supper Club" and I was the cook. I made penne with chicken and homemade garlic-scape pesto, salad, and Italian Cream Cake. Yum. After dinner we strolled up to the new Aldrichs to check out the goods. Very crowded, hard to see what was really there. Subsequent trips later in the weekend filled in the blanks. Sammy (and mommy) loved the free samples of soft serve ice cream.

Saturday morning was Farmers Market day, picking up our first Farm Share. We got carrots, cucumber, two kinds of lettuce, endive, dill, green onion, beets, spinach, chard, parsley, and snow peas. Turns out I'm the only person in PT that went for the farm share, though they sold lots of "Nash Bucks." I just want them to tell me what's fresh, pack it up for me, and have it ready to go. No brainer produce.

Saturday night we had dinner with some friends nearby. These are people I would probably be friends with if we all still lived in Seattle. They used to live in my old neighborhood, and we all get along well. Our kids have trouble playing together though. They have a girl Sam's age and the two of them haven't figured out how to play well together. I'm sure with time it will all work out. Their gorgeous son is nearly a year old. When I was holding him, he patted my chest, got a gleam in his eye, and tried to nosedive. Funny how nursing babies recognize a nursing mom.

Sunday morning was a birthday party for a two year old girl up the street. Lots of kids, and twice as many adults. The great thing about these parties is the yards are always fenced, there are plenty of toys, and great (and kid friendly) food. Very easy for the whole family to have a good time.

In the afternoon we drove out to Cape George to visit another friend, who has an 18month old daughter. We brought dinner (including a fantastic beet salad, my first time cooking beets). Early evening home, Steve went in to work for a few hours, a little Family Guy, and bed.

(It has taken me two hours to write this post, what with kids needs and a walk to Sam's school. I was much more enthusiastic about it when I started. Gah.)

musings

What is it with painted toenails? I have only done mine twice that I recall in the last seven years. Once in Mexico (to complement my tan) and once for my wedding (to go with my fancy dress). But I know women who don't "do" their hair, no make up, fingernails ragged and sometimes bitten, but their toes are all done up in red, purple, or whathaveyou. I remember a guy friend in college who talked once about what a turn on it was to look down the bed and see painted toenails on the feet of his lady. Whatever.

If you take a picture of your fat self and post it someplace (refrigerator, closet, bathroom scale) does it really help you lose weight? Or do you just feel guilty about looking like a pig?

If your blog allows comments and nobody makes them, does that mean nobody is reading? Or that nobody cares? And what about people who don't allow comments on their blog? What's up with that?

Two teeth and a shit storm

The arrival of Athena's first teeth this morning was overshadowed by an unprecedented shitstorm by her big brother. Sam went to "Saturday Night Preschool" last night (while mom & dad stayed home to work and care for baby), and presumably ate too much "sticky crackers" aka fruit leather.

It started innocently enough, but before we knew it we had about two cups of nasty stinky shit leaking then pouring out of one very inadequate diaper. Splash! Despite showers, baths, Fantastik (garden fresh scent!) and Lysol, I can still smell it. If you come over and we still haven't erradicated the smell, be kind. You could be next.

Honeymoon, Part 2

What were *you* doing five years ago today?

Party Girl

Athena in her very first party dress. Let the princess phase begin! "Where's my party dress?" asked Sam. Next trip to Goodwill...