running update

Yes, I'm still running. Three days a week; I haven't missed a day yet since the beginning of August. I am up to three miles at a time, a plodding 47 minutes. But hey, I run up some wicked hills (F street, for those in the know).

I read somewhere that people shouldn't worry about how they look when they are running, because to non-runners they are invisible and other runners see them and get jealous that they aren't running too. I didn't start really noticing runners until I decided to start running myself. I decided nearly a year before I actually did it, so I had some time. And the jealousy part is definitely true for me.

I also have this weird feeling of ownership over my route. Since I run in my neighborhood, I also drive those roads later in the day. I often think, "Yeah, I was just here a few hours ago, when the sun was coming up and there was a light mist. It felt good then, and it feels good now to think about it. I am a runner."

Only its more like I am a rock star!

At home

Tonight is the first night this week that I've been at home. Monday I decided last minute to attend the City Council meeting. It was a public hearing on the budget; I was the only "public" to speak before the council. But you can bet the letters to the editor will be flying once the decisions are already made.

Tuesday was a meeting at church. I'm co-chair of the capital campaign committee, and we are working right now on some pre-campaign business. A good group of people and we finished early.

Wednesday was the ACLU/PFLAG presentation on reproductive rights. For those of you who know me well, you know this is my HOT issue. I write very few checks to charity, but Planned Parenthood has got my money for over a decade. When you take away a woman's control over her reproductive status (and I'm not just talking about abortion here, that's the end of a long line of reproductive rights that starts with education and continues on through access, social acceptance, etc.)... when you take away a woman's control over her reproductive status all women are devalued. I could go on and on, but suffice to say the ACLU person didn't know much more than I did and certainly knew less about local issues. FWIW, you can get your emergency contraception (EC, a.k.a. PlanB) at the Health Dept., Don's Pharmacy, or Hadlock QFC. Feel free to complain to Safeway (the only pharmacy open on Sundays) and urge them to stop considering and start offering EC. It is not an abortifant, and is most effective at preventing pregnancy when used within 72 hours. Spread the word.

Thursday was the NAMI presentation on recognizing signs of mental illness in children and adolescents. Steve rocked! He did a great presentation; very caring, honest, helpful, and earnest without being "heavy." I hope he gets a chance to talk to kids too. Bonus: babysitter Bridget got both kids to sleep on time and happily.

Tonight I finally got to stay home. Steve got his turn to have an evening out for a music course. Tomorrow is the Grant Street Carnival (we are working the cake walk), Halloween parties (which one to attend??), and the final Farmer's Market. Sunday is church (wear your costume!) and prepping for the Blaine St. festivities. After Monday's madness we head down to Vancouver for another conference.

Whew. I'm tired.

Hi Mama!

Athena has been saying "mama" for awhile now. She also says Dada and Baba (brother) and Nana (nursing? no?). But today I opened the car door to get her out and I said, "Hi baby!" and she answered, "Hi Mama!"

Oh.my.goodness

Girl is growing up fast!

speaking in code

So, we're probably going to do this thing, which is really cool, and will make everything better in the long run, but will cause a lot of stress, but will be very exciting, and a big risk, and it's really the only option, and will take a lot of time and energy and be totally worth it in the end (I hope).

At the same time, I want to do this other thing, which is not in contradiction to the first thing, but the timing is bad on one hand but I want to do it now, and I'm really not ready, but I don't want to lose momentum, realizing that if it really is the right thing then time will only make it better.

Meanwhile, I've been in two situations with two people whom I can barely stand to be in proximity to and I'm trying very hard not to dismiss them completely as human beings simply because they push my buttons in the worst possible way and I just want to run screaming from the room every time either one of them opens their mouth. I am completely positive that neither of these people reads or even knows about this blog so it isn't you, believe me.

And I have this other thing going on that is painful and ridiculous and I'm procrastinating doing anything about it for no particular reason other than I'm so busy which is nothing unusual and everyone has too much to do so why don't I just make the damn phone call already and get it over with?

On a brighter note, Athena got new shoes today. They are very cute!

Personal vision statement

My trip to Spokane threw my schedule off, so that today was a running day. I stayed up late last night, and Sam was at my bedside at 7:03am. Baby got up too, and as we all lay there in the bed I said, "well I guess I'm not running today." Not five minutes later, my sweet but groggy husband says, "you could go running now if you want. It's OK." I slithered through the tiny window of opportunity that his support provided me, and was very glad I did.

On my run I was thinking about the kind of person I want to be, and it reminded me of a sort of personal vision statement that I created about ten years ago. I don't recall how it came about (self help book? work-related training? Cosmo quiz?) but here is what I came up with: Beth is Strong, and Kind, and Free.

Over the years I've come back to that, and evaluated my decisions based on whether they add to my vision or not. I was thinking about it this morning in the context of a couple of situations I've been in recently. It was as much about what I don't what to be as what I do. For instance, I don't want to be someone who says snarky sarcastic things about other people; that's not kind. I don't want the people in my life to have control over me; that's not free. And I don't want to let a minor inconvenience derail my plans; that's not strong.

Am I strong and kind and free? Not always, but mostly. It's a worthy goal. And isn't that what a vision statement is all about?

What is your personal vision statement? Who do you strive to be?

Sammy

He is so damn cute!!

Spokane

I was lucky that my recent conference was held in Spokane, where my sister Rebecca lives with her daughters Melissa (14) and Tia (16). They took care of Athena, while Sam stayed home with dad. It was a huge relief to not worry about whether she was crying, as they were unfazed by it and by the end of the two days she was in love with her "girl family." Me too.